Talking to Beautiful Women 101

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Be Fearless with your Best Qualities

This article is about something pretty simple: talking. There are really two kinds of ways to talk to girls, rapport building and rapport breaking. Rapport building before she wants it is disastrous to the pick-up; rapport breaking when she wants rapport is also a seduction killer. I've found that a lot of guys are naturally really good at one and not so good at the other, then wonder why they flounder.

Arouse her Interest and her Libido in an Instant

Rapport breaking is a major part of attraction. For someone like me, who used to worry about whether I'd be liked, this blindingly obvious knowledge was the great unknown. Seduction's first step is this: create interest in the girl before you show interest in her. Almost every guy you've seen get blown out or have his flirting rejected was a victim of his own interest. If you haven't got the value, you haven't got the hook, you haven't got the comfort and you haven't got the girl.

Be fun, be talkative, but don't act like you're attracted to her because girls have thousands of guys desperate to have sex with them. It's flattering at a distance, but once you're up close and talking to the girl it's creepy. Girls don't enjoy it. I don't enjoy it when girls do it to me.

Every beautiful girl rightly assumes that you're talking to her because you're attracted to her. She can do this confidently because the thousand guys before you were all attracted to her and whatever special qualities you have are just getting lost in the stream of suitors which form a blur in front of her. Whether or not you are a sexual champion is irrelevant if she assumes you're part of the chump horde. If she gives you a chance to talk, a neutral, non-interested and funny conversation can separate you from the herd because it's so rare for guys to just be normal around hot women. (That's when rapport breaking comes in.)

It doesn't matter if she gives you a chance to talk or not because you're going to take it. The way you talk to her will instantly convey that you are not part of the horde. The simplest ways to break rapport and convey that you're one of the elite are to talk over her, find a flaw in her, ignore her when she talks, and to lead the conversation away from whatever she's talking about. Obviously, some of these are to be done only once: you don't want to come across as an asshole, you want to come across as a fun, high-value man who's not immediately won over.

Is your voice loud and expressive? Good. If not, change that immediately. Fake it if you need to. No one will ever know unless you fall back into your regular voice and, if that happens, fuck them anyways. This is about you having a fulfilling life with beautiful, intelligent, loving women. And it's definitely worth a little embarrassment.

Interrupting her: simple, but you need to do it confidently. If you're just starting out, talking at all is going to be difficult and you might be relieved when girls do most of the talking. This will feel like a relief to you, but it's not a good thing because you've gone from shy guy to guy who will stand there and happily listen to any damn thing she says. It feels like bonding, but it's not. There are lots of these guys around and they're not sleeping with her.

You will probably have to interrupt her quite a few times in order to convey the things you want to convey. At its core it communicates that whatever she's saying isn't quite interesting enough for you, but you still want to have fun with her. The safest way for a shy person to interrupt someone is to interrupt them by asking them a question about themselves. Who could possibly be angry at that, right? Then make fun of their answer and get them laughing. Eventually the formula won't be interrupt + ask question. It'll be interrupt + tease, interrupt + hook, interrupt + cold read, etc. You don't need to play it safe if you're having fun and don't care about her reaction.

Talking over her: again, a simple thing, but needs to be done confidently. Too many guys will stop talking when a girl starts talking. And girls... everyone, really... will start talking in the middle of your sentences. This is interrupting you. If someone interrupts you, speak much louder (but not faster) and continue on in an unperturbed manner until they either shut up or you finish your sentence. Sometimes I've said, "Hey, I'm talking now." and have continued as they stood there, shocked and intrigued.

If someone is feuding for a girl's attention with you, talk over him and tap the target on the shoulder to get her attention again. Simple things.

Ignore her when she talks: do only once. Ignore the target the first time she talks to you by turning your attention to her friends for a second. Then bring it back. She will be intrigued.

Find a flaw in her: do this in a playful or neutral way, not in a mean way. Do only once. It's as simple as, "Wow, you're cute. Too bad you're not my type." or "Your nose is red. It's cute. You're just like a little Eskimo." or "Your hair is cute. You're like a little elf." or "Your hands are cold. You have poor circulation." or "You blink a lot." or "Your nose wiggles." or "You have something in your hair." (Then pretend to pick it out... kino!)

Get it? You're not being mean, but you're saying things that a guy trying to get into her pants would NOT say. In my opinion, which will come through in this entire article, the beginning of the interaction hinges on how well you handle her preconceived notions of you, most of which have nothing to do with you.

Leading the conversation away from whatever she's talking about: do frequently. Men who have attractive personalities display their attractive personalities. They naturally keep the conversation going in directions that will let them be witty and cool and unique (whether through jokes or stories or whatever) and so will you. Got that? Girls won't seduce themselves for you and they won't guide the conversation for you to come off as amazing. You need to do that. Naturally confident guys do this just by talking about whatever the hell they want to talk about and having fun teasing other people. You're going to do the same thing. The difference is that naturally cool guys have internalized their A-material while you're just becoming comfortable with yours.

Also, you always want to steer the conversation away from certain topics which girls will frequently try to tackle even though it means death to the seduction. (These topics are covered in McMaax's audio series on his world-renowned 7 Point Model of Seduction.)

Leading the conversation is just that: leading. Doing it displays leadership, which is a very attractive trait. Add some humour and some challenging remarks and you will build attraction easily.


Connect with her in a way she Lusts After

For someone like me, who naturally builds rapport with people, this is an eye-rolling bit of simplicity, but there are many who don't know these things.

The easiest way to build rapport is to respond to what she has said with a similar experience of your own.

That's it. That's the simplest formula possible. That's all it takes to display a connection between the two of you, one that she will value.

She won't forget this exchange since most guys cannot build significant comfort; most people do not know how to demonstrate a deep connection, only talk about one. Illustrating that you really understand what was important to her in the story she just told you (by relating it to an experience of your own) is much more powerful than sitting their exclaiming, "Me too! We have such a deep connection between us! I could feel it in an instant, this powerful thing between us, deep inside you, blah blah..." is what some schools of seduction teach. Which is good, NLP is powerful, but this technique is great because it's simple, genuine and guttural.

Another simple way to build rapport is to simply tell her about something you're passionate about.

A favourite memory, your goals, whatever. Just let her get sucked into your world and your feelings. This is powerful for so many reasons. I like it simply because it's an emotional roller coaster for both of you. I tell a hilarious story about when I was a shy little kid and was absolutely embarrassed in front of the entire school. We both crack up, but she also knows how horrible it must have been and she feels so much closer to me because of it. The more emotions the two of you share, the closer you'll be. Remember: girls love emotions.

Additionally, really hot girls don't generally seek rapport. For her to find herself in that position with you, where she eagerly absorbs your information, tells a part of her brain that you stand out as a man. There is a moment of beautiful synergy where you go back and forth with your emotionally charged tales as you work in tandem to bring the two of you even closer together.

(It's covered in depth in McMaax's audio series, but don't forget that rapport building is not the final step: seduction is. So make sure you're whispering in her ear, holding her, stroking her inner arms, and teasing her with little kisses as you talk. If you don't, you'll stall.)

Notice that neither of these conversational techniques means that you sit there as she babbles. Too many guys are so happy to just listen to anything she says with a big smile on their faces. This is not that kind of interaction and you have to make sure it never becomes one.

Another simple way to build rapport is isolation / venue changing.

The physical act of being alone with her requires trust on her part, so make it happen. Any bonding between you will be easier if there are less interruptions around, so even though you can connect with her in a large group of people it will be easier to take her some place more logistically sound, even if it's just a quieter corner of the club.

If you can venue change her once or twice (taking her to some different location where you can further connect in a radically different social frame), you will have immediately separated yourself from the vast number of guys who hit on her and you'll have created a sense of mutual trust and adventuring that is vastly out of proportion to the small time you have spent together.

If these have been holes in your game... and have the wisdom to recognize when you have holes in your game... use this information and plug them immediately. Then go out there and do something spectacular! To see these techniques demonstrated live, in-field (and to radically accelerate your seduction abilities) sign up for one of our Maaximum Seduction bootcamps! Grab a location near you before they sell out!

He's so passive she beat his dog.

Quick field report. Knight and I went out to an awesome bar in Mississauga. Not much traditional pick-up, but we met a few different groups of girls and pulled them into a big party on the dance floor. Number closed two girls. One was very intelligent and classy. I think I'm leaving my trash phase, something I'm not very happy about.

One of the girls bought me a drink then threw her drink on some guy. He freaked out so I needed to calm him down and send him packing. Then she spent the rest of the night running around telling everyone about what happened. Total drama queen. She spent a good portion of the night repeating the story to some guy who, while well-dressed and good-looking, was very eager to get into her pants and had no idea he had simply become the guy who'll eagerly listen to any stupid shit she says.

HBTogether told me the story of a guy she knows who is so lame that he'll take any kind of shit from women, even if they physically abuse him. His last girlfriend was so disgusted with him that she beat his dog to see if he'd grow a backbone. Take from this story what you will. I found it hilarious and horrible all at the same time.

Two Strippers and a Midget Pissing on You

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(this was written awhile ago and only posted now. It's kind of a follow-up to my verbal seduction experiment selling my mattresses.)

Romanian girl called me yesterday and I said I'd try to make time for her later. Anyways, today I text seduced a random girl.

Her: Is this your mobile?

Me: Yeah. Who am I talking to?

Her: HBshorty

Me: What can I do for you?

Her: Is this Knight?

Me: No, this is Smashbug. Do you want me to pass on a message?

Her: That's alright. Thanks anyways though... Sorry for bothering you. Have a good one.

Me: hahaha I like how you got all apologetic instead of cursing Knight for being a phoneless phenom.

Her: Oh I cursed him... in my head. And it's not your fault... I think he said something about you guys taking him out... I though this was his but I think it was a... I'll call you from this number if we're down osbourn. Who am I texting to anyways?

Me: I know it's not my fault. Its yours for not growing a backbone and kicking his ass. He's a cool guy, but he borrows phones like a hobo. I've yelled at him a few times. No luck. All I can do now is keep stealing his girlfriends and do awful things to them in the sack. That really pisses him off. Have you ever been tied up and pissed on while shooting leather porn with two strippers and a midget? My house. At seven sharp.

Her: Haha! So who are you?

Me: I can't tell you. It wouldn't be proper.

Her: WHAT? Don't be a butt face who are you!

Me: You're a butt face. That's something my little sister would have said. When she was five!

(at this point in the real world, I talked to Knight and he said this girl was a girl he was making out with last night. I read him what I'd sent her and he laughed his ass off.)

Her: Yes well I pride myself in child like come backs. Can you tell me who you are so if I happen to meet you tonight it won't be so awkward?

Me: Why are you feeling awkward?

Her: I'm not really... Did you just send me a picture... if so I didn't get it...

Me: Nope. I didn't just send you a picture. Wouldn't it be weird if some random was photographing his penis and sending it to you? Ewwww. If I send mine I'll put a little hat on it. That, and the swooning you feel, will let you know it's mine. P.S. Stop sending me dirty messages. That's so gross. What's wrong with you?

Her: What... I have not been sending out dirty messages. Definitely did not mean seeing you tonight as "seeing" you tonight

Her: I meant if you bring Knight down to Osbourn

Her: I'm confused.

Me: lol you're fun. What's your name again?

Her: lol, look back in your texting history. Who are you? and does logit even have a cell?

Her: And by logit I mean Knight.

Me: And by Knight you mean take off your pants. Well, I won't do it.

Her: Oh gosh your difficult. I don't want you to take off your pants!!! Keep them ON!!!

Me: Clever... classic reverse psycholoy. Oh, you're good. You almost had me taking my pants off. I'm totally going to warn Knight that you're a sexual predator. You're dangerous.

Her: Oh gosh... please don't.

Her: P.S. I think he gets that already.

(here's where I started wandering into unfamiliar territory. I went into the kind of jerkiness and mean humour that just isn't in my comfort zone. I was actually nervous texting this.)

Me: how many babies do you have?

Her: NO still a virgin

Me: Liar. Your texts are all sweaty. I thought you had a weight problem, but the truth is you're having sex right now. Tell Knight to call me when he's done.

Her: Wow. That was rude.

Her: Where exactly do you think it's okay to be that rude to anyone?

(damn, this turned out badly. Didn't it? I mean I left my comfort zone, trying to be edgy and funny, and I offended her. What should I do here? Apologize? I mean, I did feel that I was rude, but that may have just been my shy mindset coming out to play. Turn the tables and say she was fun at first, but now I'm losing interest and neither of us like the results? I went with a sort of apology.)

Her: Well sorry for bothering you and have a good rest of the day.

Me: Yeah, this was fun at first but I think I forgot you're a stranger. Too many text messages to too many people while I'm running around doing stuff. Hopefully you can understand that.

(Knight calls me and tells me I'm awesome.

Me: "What's up?"

Knight: "HBShorty just called and told me she hates you because you want to piss on her and you asked if she had babies and called her a liar. So I said, 'yeah, but you love him. You want to be best friends with him. you're calling me right now with a big smile on your face, aren't you? You want to meet him tonight, don't you? Well, he's got a tight schedule but I might be able to get him to work you in.' And she said, 'yeah.'"

So Knight reeled her in for me. Though, in case I need to mention it to anyone, this is Knight's girl and we both know it. I'm not a poacher.)

Her: Smashbug! You man whore!

Me: Did you google me? Scary.

Her: lol no, I talked to Knight. Lol. I'm going to poke you in the eye. Lol I'm not offended anymore.

Me: Well, now I'm offended. Poke me in the eye? Can you get any crazier? Sheesh. Just bring me flowers like other girls. What kind of romantic meal can you cook for me?

Her: No sir, what meal can you cook me!

Me: Pantsless lasagna with pantsless souffle and pantsless truffles with a dessert of mind-shattering orgasms. P.S. Don't bring your pants.

Her: Haha did yo umiss the part where I'm somwhat interested in Knight?

Her: And you also missed the part where I don't have sex.

Me: He'll be there too. It's a contest to see who can give you the biggest orgasms. I bet ten dollars that I can make your heart stop for a minute.




Now the follow up to this story is my further experiments with how powerful it is to take a girl all over the emotional map. I used to think an emotional roller coaster was making her laugh, then sharing something sad with her, then telling her something that would make her angry, then making her laugh again. The real power of an emotional roller coaster is making her hate you then love you. Abusive boyfriends and assholes do it by hurting her. A way I'm comfortable with is to get her frustrated and angry then making her feel good again.

This girl still loves to text me a month later. Fun stuff.